Disclaimer: If you’re offended by cursing stop reading now, because this is one is no holds barred. Also - be sure to comment and like to help the blog!!!!
Side note: Did you know that the saying “no holds barred” originates from wrestling and the fact that in a given match no type of hold would be restricted? If you did, good for you. I just learned that today. Also, “No Holds Barred” was a 1989 wrestling film. So, there’s your random fact for today.
Anyways, in my opinion we are at a unique time as a society and as we barrel towards the constant change and unknown, I am growing increasingly tired of what I am deeming to be outdated cultural values and standards. I have said this in inner circles for years, that life is one giant fucking game. A game in which smaller games exist. Depending on how you play the game, determines the path in which your life plays out. And as with any game, there are uncontrolled and unknown variables that arise that must be dealt with; some of which you can prepare for and others that you cannot. This notion isn’t an original thought, in fact there’s a board game called: “The Game of Life”. The challenge is, people become so entranced in the game, that they can forget that they are playing.
A tangible example of this is reality TV, pick any reality show, say Big Brother. Here’s a show that casks people, who either want to be on the show as a fan, or probably have ulterior motives in building their brand, social media presence, break into Hollywood etc. There’s no secret to the situation in the show, you are on camera, 24/7 and in a confined space for a finite amount of time. The show starts out more often than not with contestants feeling each other out and really being careful about what they say in order to maintain an appearance, or character they are trying to portray. Then something that is fascinating to me happens: people stop giving a shit. People seem to forget that there are cameras there, and people start to act like themselves. This is what contributes to the entertainment value of the show.
I say all this to illustrate the point that people in general need to stop faking for the game. It creates a false narrative as to who you really are and instead you’re acting the way you perceive people think you should act. I think of interactions I have with people professionally. Some are super genuine and we can talk professionally and as equals. In other conversations, it’s as if it’s some sort of charade with canned responses, which usually ends up in some long drawn out jerk off session to make sure everyone’s egos have been stroked enough. What seems even crazier to me, is that someone people can acknowledge that is happening, while others (to my point above) are so wrapped up in their character they are oblivious to how hilarious they sound. In no way am I saying you don’t need to play, because the game cannot be escaped, and we all must play. Just have the self-awareness to know when you are playing the game when it’s needed and don’t lose yourself and who you are.
I think this starts when you’re a child and the environment in which you’re raised. You begin to form an image and idea about what it means to be an adult. All the while you’re picking up things that interest you. Maybe you play Legos, maybe you like sports, theater, or fantastical stories. But what do we all hear during that time: enjoy being a kid, because eventually you have to “grow up”. Have you seen “The Lego Movie”?
Eventually you need to grow up. You need to act like an adult.
Says fucking who? Who defined that? Why in the age of being “woke” are we still pushing this narrative?
Why not start this narrative with children: work hard, find your passion, be responsible. I bet to some people that may be what they mean by “Act like an adult”, but remember, as kids we formulate our beliefs based on observations. If we are observing people “playing business” and having meaningless fucking meetings to stroke each other’s egos, then that’s what we grow up to do.
Don’t get me wrong, if someone is passionate about living that “adult” life and doing “adult” things, that’s fine. I certainly enjoy some adult things. I just have so little tolerance for the overly formal, to those that turn their nose up to things that are deemed fun and immature and to those that hang their entire existence to an image or status that in the end means nothing.
I am not saying to be rude or an asshole. I believe in just striving to treat others who you would want to be treated, but that’s not an “adult” thing, that’s a human thing. If you’re reading this, I want you to take away one thing: Be who you are. Don’t apologize for it. Don’t compromise who you are for acceptance. Don’t go through life missing out on experiences or things that you enjoy, because you’re afraid of being judged.
When I look back on my short life, all my successes have come when I let go of my insecurities and seize the moment. When I am indulging in things that make me happy and when I am doing work that I am truly passionate about, not just focused on a paycheck. There’s no social or political strategy that will replace hard work and passion. Sure, you may end up in a spot making money, but if you’re dead inside or faking who you are, what was the point?